(FLP Satire) - In a move sure to stoke discussion, Barack Obama has promoted Melissa Cantwell to Super Czar of Gun Safety after a gun accident at her home last week in Maryland. Cantwell accidentally shot herself in the foot while unloading her Taurus 9MM.
At a news conference held from her bedroom yesterday, she claimed not to know a bullet remained in the chamber when she dropped the magazine out of the pistol. "I figured I'd make sure it was empty by aiming it at my foot and pulling the trigger". When asked why she aimed it at body part, she said, "Well, duh? If I'd have aimed it at my head it would have killed me, so I chose my foot instead."
In announcing the promotion, Obama said, "Melissa Cantwell now has the experience of having been shot. Most people outside of my hometown of Chicago have not been shot, so I think that is very important to her credibility as an expert on gun safety". He continued, "This experience will make her much better at helping others to understand where to point a gun when you pull the trigger. As she so aptly demonstrated, it should never be at your head."